G.I.DAVE’s Cartoon Realism: Silly or Gritty? “Money to Burn”
By @G_I_DAVE
Hello fellow fans and friends! G.I. DAVE here, your not getting rid of me THAT easy! We’re back diving into another G.I. Joe Sunbow episode to see if it leans more silly or realistic. Been having fun doing these, and I may be the perfect Joe fan for it. I’ve always seen myself as a “comic guy”, and brush away the toon a lot, so going back and watching some of these that I “barely remember”, has really given me a new perspective on the old show. I still hate the lasers, but there IS some great stuff here. Dive in with me! Cmon Team!
“Money to Burn” (Sunbow Season 1 Episode 21) is a pure economic-warfare plot. Cobra develops a “thermal molecular ignition transmitter” that remotely incinerates all U.S. paper currency at once. The episode opens with criminals stealing ASSETS, that are worth money, NOT money. Cobra’s idea, is to delete paper money, and have actual, TANGIBLE assets instead of paper. That hits HARD In these times, where most of our “money” is simply a binary digit on a bank screen. Lots of people know tangible assets are VERY valuable if money is gone or useless.
We even see the Joe team on “down time” playing a game of poker, with Ace, the card shark ready to rake in all the cash, when it all just poofs into flames. Scenes all around the country show average citizens losing their cash all at once. ATMs dumping dust, money “proofing” from safes and even under grannies mattress.
Tomax and Xamot REALLY shine here. They have a plan to pay thieves to steal jewelry, art, and valuables, stockpiling wealth, REAL wealth, tangible assets like Gold, jewels, and art. It is suggested this is a global operation gathering all the tangible assets. The Twins are seen coordinating the operation, and then head right to the Extensive Enterprises building, change from their traditional look, into Blue suits, walk right through the board room into their CEO office. This was DOPE. It really shows off the Brains of Extensive Enterprises Leaders, getting their hands “dirty” on the ground, and transition right to barons of a massive corporation. I found it funny they ride a stolen “Blinks” armored car full of assets back to the Extensive Enterprises building..way back when the first “Armoring” job I had was Upfitting Brinks trucks, with a modern RFID interlock system.
Once the money vanishes, Cobra Commander broadcasts that the old currency is gone as “punishment, for the world leaders gross incompetence of financial decisions” and the new currency is Cobra gold coins available only by trading valuables (or agreeing to labor) at Extensive Enterprises fronts. The United States collapses into riots and barter within days. Now this is BASED. As I said before, when we had the big blackout, I seen how close our modern civilization is on teetering to collapse with electric power, but you take away the money, people can’t feed their kids. When THAT happens, you have immediate anarchy. Mass riots..BAD TIMES. If you want to feed your kids, you have to submit to Cobra, and bring assets or barter work for food.
NOW THAT…is real… DEVIOUS shit right there.
the U.S. Mint cannot reprint because the ray will simply destroy new bills.
The Joes track the scheme through the Extensive Enterprises line, and a small team with Flint, Lady Jaye, Alpine and others, and when they try to get in to the Extensive Enterprises building, the now angry citizens tell them to “get at the back of the line” and eventually start to attack the Joes mob style. Alpine saves a child from disaster, and shows the citizens they are “the good guys” and let them pass. Tomax and Xamot are interrupted during a meeting with a Rich Woman, heiress Madeline Henderhaunch, who they are trying to convince to give them all her assets.
The Twins explain “we are just brokers, we aren’t doing anything illegal…” And the Joes walk out with a plan to have Lady Jaye disguise as the heiress, and infiltrate the scheme.
Lady Jaye infiltrates as the heiress Madeline Henderhaunch, and is taken to a secret minting base hidden inside a holographic mountain, She gets discovered by Tomax and Xamot, and when she tried to destroy the “destroy money machine”, she is stopped by the twins.
During this time, Ace and Ripcord are in a Skystriker, that tailed Lady Jaye in disguise, and watched the jet with Tomax and Xamot fly right into a mountain and disappear. Ace even says “I didn’t pick up a crash on thermal..”
My boy Ripcord does not buy it. He knows there is something up with the fake mountain, and bails out of the Skystriker to STR8 HALO right through the holographic mountain, and discovers
The Cobra base/vault, and calls for an assault for back up.
This air assault is a full fledged Divisional sized
attack force, with a rediculously large C5A type loaded with Joe ground and CAS assets, and TONS of “no name” soldiers along with the Joe team. The assault is stalled when Firefly uses a flamethrower and creates an Avalanche, and bogs down the Joe advance. This is REALLY starting to look like a true defensive plan, with redundant defensive plays at hand. The team has worked up into a fatal funnel of a large section of A.S.P.s defending the pass. Even Roadblock says “we could be here for weeks”. This part was LEGIT as hell for me. It’s quick, but the idea of the Joe team assault, stalled and pinned down by direct fire artillery from A.S.P.s is just wicked cool to me.
Ripcord plants a bomb that destroys the transmitter and vault, the explosion rains the fake coins and the greedy Cobra troops abandon the fight to loot them, giving the the Joes a minute to destroy the emplaced A.S.P.s, and smash the defenses, continuing the advance/assault.
Cobra leadership escapes, and order is restored. The episode is bookended from the beginning scene with a Joe poker game that Ace actually loses, and Ripcord busts a full house and gets back his cash.
The core concept has real teeth! Destroying a nation’s medium of exchange to force submission is classic asymmetric economic warfare. It echoes real currency collapses, hyperinflation, and attempts to replace a currency with a controlled alternative. The corporate front (Extensive Enterprises) and the greed of the rank-and-file (troops ignoring orders to grab the raining coins) are sharp. Everything else is pure Sunbow cartoon physics: a magic ray that only affects U.S. Federal Reserve Notes, an entire mountain that is a hologram, parachuting tanks and snowcats through the hologram, Firefly melting the snow to create a mud trap, Lady Jaye attaching a rocket to a javelin to launch Tomax off a cliff, and Ripcord escaping a trooper by tying his shoelaces together. The episode never explains how the ray discriminates currency, why other nations are unaffected, or how Cobra minted and transported enough “gold” coins in advance. The final fight resolves not through superior tactics but because Cobra’s own men choose loot over loyalty, even the Baroness is shown trying to rally her troops during the money rain! It is a solid idea executed with maximum cartoon convenience. There IS a longer Skiing scene with Flint, Jaye, and the Twins, but I kinda felt it was forced, and didn’t spend much time on it.
But the execution? Magic ray that only hits U.S. bills, holographic mountain, troops who can’t follow a simple “hold the line” order when shiny objects fall from the sky… classic Sunbow.
So what do you guys think? Does this one hold up for you as a “serious” episode? Any other Sunbow standalones you think nail the realism better? Drop your thoughts below, and don’t forget to tell me if you like the MRE Jalapeno cheese or the peanut butter!
Yo Joe!
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